make sure everyone sees this
Best shit I’ve heard in a while
loose, foot loose, put on your fuckin foot loose, feet, foot feet, dance on your fucking feet
I JUST REALIZED THAT THE PLURAL OF BEEF IS BEEVES
LOOK AT THIS
WAS I THE ONLY ONE WHO DIDNT KNOW ABOUT BEEVES
i just told my roommate this and he just got up and left the apartment, and didn’t come back right away so i went outside and he was just
that is the face of a broken man
this is by far the best comment anyone has added to my text post
I guess he had some beeves with this new information
Don’t stereotype us and then complain if we stereotype you.
actually this is the “my daddy pays for everything and ive never had a job GO Greek!” outfit.
The “My name is Preston, and I enjoy roofie-ing girls with my best buds and wearing matching sweaters” look
The ” I’ve never been with a black girl before haha” look
The “I’m drunk on somebody else’s PBR, when are you gonna play some Imagine Dragons, brah?” look
The “My Best FRiend Is Black. I Forgot His Name and Don’t Invite Him to My Neighborhood Though” look
the “I’ve Never Taken Public Transportation in My Life and Snort Coke in the Back of an Uber” look
The “I act like a stereotypical high school movie jock but the only sport I play is golf” look
The “Don’t stereotype us and complain if we stereotype you” outift
The last one tho .^^^
the “What would you do if i was there next to you right now” outfit
The “I say nigga sometimes with my friends when nobodies around” outfit
Lmfao
The “I like instigating fights but if you hit me my daddy will sue” outfit
The “without me?” outfit
The “poor people are lazy and my parents are rich because they work hard outfit”
The “u got kik” outfit
The “nah I could never be friends with a gay person. What if they hit on me?” Outfit
OH MY FUCK GOD SHIT GREATEST MOMENT OF MY SHORT LIFE
when a cat likes you, its like being elected president.
when a bird likes you, its like being chosen King Arthur, ruler of albion, the once and future king, gifted with Excalibur, born of blood and magic
You are suddenly able to see numbers above people’s heads which are counting down and you have no idea why. One person you meet reaches 0 and…
Hands you a ravioli from their back pocket. The numbers. It’s a ravioli countdown. You are the ravioli receiver.
but do i really want pocket ravioli
you have no choice. you were chosen as the sole ravioli receiver. you phsically cannot decline.
What happens if I am not there at 0 to receive the ravioli?
you receive the ravioli
How?! How can they hand it to me? If I am not there?
Do their arms nyoom out of no where and hand me ravioli?
Must I constantly be receiving ravioli every second or do I have pauses between ravioli?
Am I buried in a mound of ravioli?
the ravioli
is yours
woah
EVERY BODY NEEDS TO HEAR THIS
Everyone needs Laverne cox to come to their house and spit truth in front of the mirror
what if an ouija board was like an afterlife call center
“hey joey, line 396 is open. three teenagers in the dark want to talk to some ghost or something”
“i’m gonna prank them so hard”
“joey no”
“im gonna say i’m satan”
“JOEY THIS IS WHY THEY MADE A SHITTY MOVIE ABOUT US”
i literally hate all 260,000 of you